You will never be ready
Let’s talk about a topic that comes up A LOT when talking about setting goals or making changes, specifically making changes to your health. Being “ready”.
Eek….there’s that word, “ready”.
Will I ever be ready?
I’m not quite ready.
This will be easier when I’m ready.
I’m just not ready.
I have to get ready to make these changes.
Maybe you have said some of these statements to yourself. It’s ok. We all have. Nothing has gone wrong. Your human brain is just trying to keep you safe. It’s doing its job.
Remember, staying safe is how primitive you stays alive. And your brain hasn’t quite caught up to the fact that it’s 2023 and, luckily, we don’t need to worry about being eaten by a hungry lion or whether or not we will be able to find food tonight.
When we present a change we would like to make to our brain, it immediately starts giving us data for why that’s a bad idea. Staying the same = safe. Change = deadly.
The data that’s collected comes in the form of your thoughts. And it looks something like this:
“I’ve tried losing weight before and gained it all back. Remember how difficult and embarrassing that was? Don’t do it again.”
“There is no way I can go out to go out with my friends and not drink. They would think I’m a weirdo.”
“Healthy food is expensive and takes forever to cook. I have no time for that. I’m just lucky if the kids get dinner by 6 pm!”
“All this gas and bloating is just what I get for trying to eat healthy. Obviously, healthy foods are not good for me.”
“Pooping once a week is totally normal. My doctor would tell me if something’s wrong.”
Have you had some of those thoughts yourself? Again, I have! It’s totally normal. Nothing has gone wrong here. Your brain is trying to keep you safe by presenting you with these thoughts.
I like to think of my brain not as an organ, but as this little tiny guy who writes one-liners and is constantly trying to tell me how to feel and what to think in certain situations. Sometimes, he’s pretty smart and gets things right. Sometimes, I’d like to tell him to go to hell.
Separating myself from my brain has opened up a whole new world for me and my clients! Think of it as separating your emotional side from your logical side, if that helps to make it a little more clear. I actively try not to live in an emotional state or react from my emotions. When I learned to separate myself from my brain, many of the negative thoughts disappeared and I was able to make better decisions. I started thinking more clearly. I was also able to see the “thought errors” that kept popping up and put in the work to change those beliefs.
I feel a lot less “on edge” and stressed. I even catch myself saying to other people, “How can we make this simple?” Over-complicating things is a classic sign you’re operating from your primitive or emotional brain. There’s a time and a place for that. But when you’re trying to make health improvements, it’s not the right time. You need facts, data, and logic.
Now, to the really great part about this!
Once you recognize that the idea of being “ready” is just your brain’s way of keeping you safe, you can move on to change those beliefs. YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE READY TO MAKE CHANGES.
Because…..
YOU WILL NEVER BE READY. Your brain doesn’t want you to and will likely not allow you to be ready. Remember…
Staying the same = safe
Change = deadly
(BTW, the thought that change is deadly is an example of a thought error. You don’t have to believe that thought because it’s not true!)
When my clients think about not being “ready” to make a change I like to encourage them to look at the need to be ready as an excuse their brain is creating so they don’t do the thing.
And we all know where excuses can go!!
How do you clean up these thoughts? Easy!
You change them!
Yep, it’s really that simple. I coach on this a lot. It’s not easy to change your thoughts or beliefs, but it is simple. The words “easy” and “simple” are not the same. “Easy” implies that it takes very little effort, while “simple” implies that there are only one or two steps to the process. See where this message gets mixed up in our heads? (Another thought error!)
The idea is that your thoughts will either make the process of changing difficult or simple. If you have the thought that you are not ready and need X, Y, and Z to change first before you can change, your brain is going to tell you that is true and come up with all the [BS] reasons why.
Don’t listen.
You do not need to be ready. X, Y, and Z do not need to happen first. You don’t need to lose 10 lbs before you hire a weight loss coach. You don’t need to be able to lift a 15 lb dumbbell before you hire a personal trainer. You don’t need to learn basic Italian before you hire a tutor. And you don’t need to stop your bad habits before you hire a health coach.
THIS IS WHAT WE DO!
It doesn’t matter where you start. All that matters is that you start. And let me tell you something I know for sure, you will never be the same as you are right now. Waiting to make changes will likely make those changes more difficult, not easier. Sure, you can do a lot on your own and I would certainly encourage you to do so. But it is so much easier with a pro on your side! We will pick you up a lot faster than you can pick yourself up!
The other thing to realize is that when it comes to your health, just like when you own your own business, there will always be more work to do. You don’t just check things off your list and then, one day, coast and not care about food or exercise ever again. Sorry, honey, but it doesn’t work that way. There will always be skills to refine, new foods to try, and challenges you would like to conquer. It’s coming whether you like it or not! IMHO it’s best to figure out how to live a life that welcomes change and new things. Make health part of your lifestyle and you can’t go wrong!
Waiting until just the right time and you feel “ready”, just isn’t going to happen. What is going to happen though, is that one day, hopefully soon, you will realize that you don’t want to wait any longer. You want that result. And you wish you would have started months or years ago!
Don’t wait. You will never be ready. “Ready” is an excuse and today is the day we stop it.