Let’s crush some goals…Finally!

New Year’s Resolutions.

With every new year that comes around, you are given an opportunity for a new beginning. It’s a new chapter in the book of your life. A time to let go of things that no longer serve you and focus on things that will help you get to where you want to go. Another chance to be better, learn from last year’s mistakes and grow into this year’s version of you.

In reality, however, January 1st is just another day. It’s a continuation of life, of yourself, of your future. So why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to set crazy lofty goals, take on insurmountable amounts of extra responsibilities, and evaluate every aspect of our lives to determine we are not good enough?

I have seen very few people over the years say something along the lines of, “Wow! I was awesome this past year! In the new year, I’m going to be more awesome!” And instead, I see many people say, “I gained weight, I’m still at the same dead-end job, and I feel 10 years older than I did last year. What a waste of a year.”

What is it about this time of year that makes us all go a little crazy? I know you know what I’m talking about. The negativity, the judgment, the unrealistic expectations. It all creates negative energy that we drag into the new year hoping, wishing, and praying that things will magically be “better”. Even though “Better” is a relative term and, unfortunately, sets the stage for failure.

So, what can we do about this? How can we change our mindset to stop judging and start celebrating life and all that comes with it?

What I find when working with wellness coaching clients is that it is really easy to set goals but it is really difficult to follow through with them for three main reasons.

First, the goals are too big. You are not going to lose 50 pounds in January, and you are not going to complete your Master’s degree by spring if you are not even registered for this semester’s classes yet. But we set those goals because they feel like goals we should be setting.

Second, the goals are not measurable. You want to spend more time with your family and less time working. Does that mean you want to cut down to working part-time? Or be home by 5:00 pm every day? Or watch less tv so you can actually spend time with your family?

Finally, there is no plan accompanied with those goals. If you have ever tried to lose weight or cut down on working extra hours, you know that doesn’t happen overnight. You need a plan. You need to start small and work your way up to the desired result.  

We are unconsciously taught that goals are simply “wishful thinking” and when we either lose interest or do not live up to what we built up in our heads, we feel like failures, are disappointed, and are often in a worse spot than when we started. Does this sound familiar to you? It is familiar to most people as most people give up on their New Year’s resolutions by February. But that makes sense with what I just outlined above.

There is a lot we can change about our goal setting habits, much of which is quite simple and actually requires less work. In the end, it is up to you whether or not you meet a goal. And it’s important to remember that just because we do not meet a goal, we are bad people or failures. Most often what I find in those situations is that the person was not quite ready to make that change or that goal is actually a longer-term goal that should be separated into smaller pieces. We have our whole lives ahead of us. We have time to learn and grow.

In my wellness coaching practice, I teach clients to simplify their goals and create actionable baby steps. Here’s how you can do the same. Grab a pen and paper and let’s get started!

1.     Think of your intentions for the new year. Do you want to lose weight? Spend more time away from work? Finally organize the basement? Then pick one or two to focus on.

2.     Label each goal as “long-term” or “short-term” and then designate a date you would like to reach it. Attaching dates has been shown to increase success rates.

3.     Now, let’s break those goals down into actionable steps. Make a list for each goal. You will pick from this list each week, so don’t worry about making them things you can accomplish right away.

4.     Focus on next week only. What are two actionable items from the lists you just made that you can accomplish next week?

5.     Make a plan. How will you complete those two actionable steps?

6.     Tell someone! You will be more likely to be successful if you tell someone your goal.

7.     At the end of the first week, evaluate how you did on your actionable steps. Do you need more time? Did you crush them? Then make a plan for next week using the same process.

Continue this process until you have mastered that goal, then work on a plan to maintain that goal so it becomes part of your everyday life.

The idea with this process is to take small, actionable steps every week, re-evaluate your progress often, and adjust as needed. When working towards your goals becomes part of your everyday life, you have a better chance of success! Good luck and let me know if you have any questions!

Happy New Year!

Peace, love & kale!

Lindsay